…

There are a million little strings attached to every choice you make that can destroy your life everytime you choose. But maybe you won’t know for twenty years and you never ever trace it to its source and you only get one chance to play it out and try to figure out your own divorce.

And they say there is no fate but there is. It is what you create. Even though the world goes on for eons and eons, you are only here for a fraction of a fraction of a second. Most of your time is spent being dead or not yet born. But while alive, you wait in vain wasting years for a phone call or a letter or a look from someone or something to make it alright. But it never comes or seems to but it never really.

So you spend your time in vague regret or vaguer hope
that something good will come along,
something to make you feel connected,
something to make you feel whole,
something to make you feel loved.

And the truth is I'm so angry,
and the truth is I'm so fucking sad,
and the truth is I've been so fucking hurt for so fucking long,
and for just as long have been pretending I'm OK just to get along.

Just for… I don’t know why…

Maybe because nobody wants to hear my misery because they have their own.

Synecdoche, New York
Charlie Kaufman